On getting hired

So Friday I interviewed at Washington University, here in my scenic city of Saint Louis. The director, with whom I was supposed to interview did not bother to show up and sent three “assistant-directors” – whatever that may mean – to do the honors.

I had brought my last performance review – which is excellent, by the way – some software architecture samples (UML for those in the know), code samples (to show I can code very well), and a live Share Point website as a demonstration.

From my point of view the interview went splendidly well. I felt we really connected and I was certain I had one of the senior positions.

Monday – the headhunter emails me – they do not wish to go ahead. Something about “too many missed deadlines”, she writes, and “WTF is that all about???”.

O.M.Goodness: I made the mistake of telling them that due to two members of my team being dismissed; one database (developed prior to my tenure in my current position) had to be trashed, as it was over- normalized and impossible to use. We had run over the deadline date by two months and $60k on a $1mil project. This translated into “too many missed deadlines”.

What is there to learn from this?

1. Make sure you are interviewed by your peers or at least people who are secure in their positions and knowledge.

2. Make sure the money is there in the first place. My review showed my current salary and they blanched visibly.

Next time?

1. Lie to the gits. No missed deadlines, no cost overruns. Record as white as the driven snow.

2. Let the headhunter produce the request with rates and salary before taking the trouble to interview.

3. If you’re interviewing with insecure gits, leave. A company attempting to hire a senior person by humiliation is not someplace one would wish to work.

4. Try not to stutter too badly. I have had a stutter since age three and some days it is really bad.

PS. The headhunter let me know that they expected me to have “put my current situation in a more favorable light”. Lesson for next time: Lie through my teeth.

Let me know your experiences, especially with WashU!

ipo-ipo